The missus & World War 2

I have reached a time in life, an age (26), and found the woman whom I think is pretty good for me. So, the next step for us is moving in together.Therefore we both have a lot of stuff and we have to find a way to decide which stays and which goes. However there is this one thing she is not to keen on and keeps asking me about, "what about all those war books and old helmets and stuff you have, are they going to be put away in storage?". Everytime this subject comes up, I often reply "If I get to decorate and use the office the way I want, you can decorate the rest of the place for all I care". What I haven't told her yet, is that this is just the very beginning of what hopefully will be a rather large collection of books and various items

So that's really my big question for all of you people out there in relationships. How do you handle the missus when it comes to having
your WW2 books and collections at home? Is it just all about making compromises? :p

Regards from a confused young man!

 

Jakob -
After 60 years of marriage - your best bet is to do it HER way - put all your stuff in the garage - eventually you can bring them in one at a time - might take years - but it's way ahead of the alternative ! Trust me ...
Cheers

 

Jacob

May I, just for a change, speak seriously ?

In July 1949, after having spent many years away from home, I too was about to reach the ripe old age of 26.

The young lady who, much to my astonishment, had agreed to marry me, took me completely on trust and married me, warts and all, for better or worse.

This included any bad habits I had, or would eventually adopt, including a study full of ww2 books, files, memorabilia, cd's, dvd's VHS tapes, and one complete section packed full of ancient coins and folders relating to that subject.

The answer to your problem is actually very simple.

Just make sure that you have found the right partner and then, as the boating parlance goes, pull together.

I speak as someone who has experienced more than 61 years of a blissfully happy married life.

And now you know ...........................

Ron

 

Jakob -
After 60 years of marriage - your best bet is to do it HER way - put all your stuff in the garage - eventually you can bring them in one at a time - might take years - but it's way ahead of the alternative ! Trust me ...
Cheers

18 years of marriage and I have only managed to claim a small bookshelf for myself

 

Thank you Tom and Ron. I suppose patience is really a virtue in this matter

 

Owen, you're right. I should have myself more clear. I do know she is the one for me. However that does nok rule out she is not to fond about all my stuff filling up the place

 

Jakob... Young fellow me lad... At 26, I had only a passing interest in WWII so age wise I can't help. But, my wife of 12 years has (unfortunately for her) had to abide with my steadily growing interest. Yes, it's time consuming (that's "quality time" in female'se) and yes, a corner of our house bears the scars of my interest. So what I would say, is, it's all about 'tact'. If your good lady has no interest in WWII then you have to offset that with an "out flanking" maneuver.

eg: "I'll decorate our abode any way you want it my dear"... "Oh, and by the way, you don't mind if I do the office in... blah! blah!" etc. etc...

I actually got my missus to accompany me to Normandy last year (a very big deal) under the guise of an 'affordable' holiday in France. By the time my rouse was rumbled, it was booked and paid for. Granted, it did cost me nearly 100 euros in a French casino to appease the wife, but it was well worth it.

But, all that said, if you're still at that lovey dovey "No, you hang up!" stage of the relationship, then now is the time to lay those foundations. This is me, and this is my baggage... etc.


Good Luck... btw: None of the above is admissible in a court of law...

 

My website says enough, great girlfirend , helps me out with the lot, loves to go to the National Archives, and sometimes with the metaldetector.

See don't like the military markets so have skipped that or only goes once a year, so no complains from my side

 

The answer is to have enough space for a study for you AND a growing family/ guest room - tact, patience and a cunning plan are required to out wit the female of the species - remember to give choices in a tactful way and let her think it is her idea (I usually lose these battles!)

 

I had the same problem until recently, I make electronic music have a large music collection and used to be a DJ, so all my stuff has now been moved into a semi loft conversion from the room it took up, out of her way hidden nicely away in my own private world if you ever get the chance and the cash it's a must!

until then find the right partner or put it in storage ;-)

 

What's a 'missus'?

 

My partner of 10 years is one of the most understanding people I have ever met. Not only does she put of with my vast collection of WWII books, but also my collection of of ancient history books, a garage full of fishing gear. The turning of our 4th bedroom into another office for my writing wasnt even met with any resistance.As mentioned in another post on the forum,she is also allowing me to turn our dining room into a little bit of a museum and display area.


In short shes a bit of a saint on that score, none of my interests float her boat, although she did once come Metal Detecting with me



Dont get me wrong we have our disagreements,especially if Ive just paid a small fortune for an out of print 1st edition. But in general she except me for what I am an 'Anorak' her wordsand is more than happy for me to sit on here talking to my WW2Talk "cronies" again her words it keeps me out of trouble and the pub she says

 

My wife does not understand the male mentality of collecting things at all. But she doesn't interfere, as long as I allow her to decide on all the major changes to the house and garden.

Ultimately, I have a wish for an office at the end of the garden, where my stuff can go and maybe where I can write my scribblings in peace!

However, you should know the Bamboo43 fire drill in this household. I have told my daughters that, if they smell smoke of fire, they are:

1. To wake me.
2. Then collect my WW2 books and other memorabilia.
3. Find the cats and get them out.
4. Wake up their mother.

Gives you a sensible balanced view I think!!

 

Ah we males are so stoopid there are ladies reading this lol, and knowing how the female of the species works on a psychic level . . . .

 

As a female of the species I think I need to add some balance here

As someone who has a lot on varied interests, including history, art, craft, re-enactment etc, my flat is full of what my brother calls 'junk'!! (costumes, cameras, books, art materials and equipment, DIY tools and family ephemera etc), I've actually had to be ruthless and get rid of a load of books, including history books as the flat was becoming so crowded I couldn't bare it.

I would say that if she isn't prepared to accept that you are a 'balanced individual' with interests other than beer, The Sun, X Factor and football, then she's not worth bothering with.

Perhaps as the other chaps say, designate one area of the house for your WW2 'stuff' and then infiltrate over the years

 

I'm one of the lucky ladies!
Married on Cup Final Day in May 1973 ... excellent coverage of the game could be heard throughout the Church during the ceremony!

I only started researching my father five years ago after mother's death in 2005 and discovery of Dad's WW2 letters. Since that time Peter has shown great interest and support whilst we've travelled down the road of discovery in search of family heritage: visits to the NA, Middle Wallop and Duxford to name just but a few.

Our spare bedroom is now full of books and papers gathered over the last five years!
The only thing Peter grumbles about a little is that I spend to much time reading WW2 Talk!

He can talk 'though! ..... he spends an equal amount of time in the garage rebuilding his old cars!

Happy New Year to one and all.
Lindsay

 

I'm one of the lucky ladies!
Married on Cup Final Day in May 1973 ... excellent coverage of the game could be heard throughout the Church during the ceremony!

I only started researching my father five years ago after mother's death in 2005 and discovery of Dad's WW2 letters. Since that time Peter has shown great interest and support whilst we've travelled down the road of discovery in search of family heritage: visits to the NA, Middle Wallop and Duxford to name just but a few.

Our spare bedroom is now full of books and papers gathered over the last five years!
The only thing Peter grumbles about a little is that I spend to much time reading WW2 Talk!

He can talk 'though! ..... he spends an equal amount of time in the garage rebuilding his old cars!

Happy New Year to one and all.
Lindsay

Hi Lindsay,

Was that Sunderland v Leeds?

Happy New Year.

 

I couldn't bare it.

Now there's an unfortunate typo!

Until pics ...B)

 

Hi Bamboo,

Yep ... Sunderland 1 Leeds 0 !

All the best for 2011
Lindsay