Jokes thread

Discussion in 'The Lounge Bar' started by Gage, Mar 25, 2006.

  1. ozzy16

    ozzy16 Well-Known Member

    Hope all the mods are down the pub tonight. ?

    Graham.
     
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  2. canuck

    canuck Closed Account

    Please, please.................keep the Brexit drama going. It is the only break we get here from the Trump obsessed media. Boris has been a refreshing change.
     
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  3. Tricky Dicky

    Tricky Dicky Don'tre member

    But ... but ...... but ...... thats fake news

    TD
     
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  4. ozzy16

    ozzy16 Well-Known Member

  5. Dave55

    Dave55 Atlanta, USA

    Pretty good-natured about their names. All of the guys who are not Key or Peele are actual players.

    I just watched HaHa Clinton-Dix score a touchdown off an interception for the Chicago Bears

     
  6. Dave55

    Dave55 Atlanta, USA

     
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  7. A-58

    A-58 Not so senior Member

    [​IMG]
     
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  8. Blutto

    Blutto Banned

    A Glock in the hand beats two car-jackers in the bush....?
     
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  9. A-58

    A-58 Not so senior Member

    Certainly. Now hopefully the AR15 has a bayonet lug on it, you know, just in case.
     
  10. A-58

    A-58 Not so senior Member

  11. Little Friend

    Little Friend Senior Member

    There's nothing like a good scratch !! Saw this odd-looking poster in a Asda car park, Oxfordshire.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Oct 5, 2019
  12. Little Friend

    Little Friend Senior Member

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    I took these a few months ago at a Asda store in Oxfordshire. If it itches, scratch it...
     
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  13. Robert-w

    Robert-w Banned

    There was a young lady from Natchez
    Whose clothing was always in patches.
    When comment arose
    On the state of her clothes,
    She drawled, "When I itches, I scratches."
     
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  14. Dave55

    Dave55 Atlanta, USA

    upload_2019-10-8_17-32-8.png
     
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  15. Dave55

    Dave55 Atlanta, USA

  16. canuck

    canuck Closed Account

    On the Wehrmacht sniping range, the lieutenant says to a fellow soldier: "That new guy over there is pretty good".

    "Yes indeed, he is a fine marksman but I think we need to investigate his personal background".

    "Why?" "After every shot he carefully removes his fingerprints from the rifle".
     
  17. stolpi

    stolpi Well-Known Member

    Old Canadian joke:


    Beaver comes back home and sees all of its hard work destroyed ... DAMN!

    :moose:

    Broken_beaver_dam_on_Blackwood_Creek_June_2014.jpg

     
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2019
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  18. Blutto

    Blutto Banned

    beaver.gif
     
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  19. Chris C

    Chris C Canadian

    From "The Swordfish Story" - this is from after Op Torch - from recollections of Don Baring-Gould -

    One other amusing incident was when we were still at Gib and we were given the task of escorting Force H through the Straits. Dennis, George and I thought we were doing a great job, particularly as there was a 60-knot headwind. We decided to sit over the leading destroyer as with only 20 knots to play with we could not move around too much. Obviously the Captain of the destroyer got a bit narked about this as it started flashing at us. As it was not too long I managed to read it: "Race you!"​
     
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  20. Dave55

    Dave55 Atlanta, USA

     
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